Asking for Help
Reprinted with permission from Christine Hassler Blog
I am moving today. To a different house in the same city but as anyone who has moved lately knows, it is super stressful. Yet as I am waiting for the movers to arrive, I am enjoying my tea, grapefruit and writing this update. So how did I manage not to pull an all nighter and carve out time for breakfast? Quite simply: I asked for help.
I have been stressed out emotionally and physically about this move for months now and noticed myself feeling completely overwhelmed. My entire body would tense in anticipation of getting everything sorted, purged, organized and packed. I knew I could not change the fact that I was moving, but could I change how the move was moving me? The answer became clear quickly: yes, by asking for help.
I got over my fear of imposing on friends and family once I thought about how I would feel if a they asked for help. Knowing how stressful moving is, I wouldn’t hesitate for an instant to lend a packing hand. I also reminded myself that my loved ones are grown ups and are fully capable of saying no if they were not available.
So two weeks ago I sent out emails and made calls to friends with the list of things I needed help with. And in a matter of a day, I had an entire schedule and system of people coming over to support me. Not only did I get things done in a timely manner, it was a lot more fun to have friends helping me do it. I even asked one friend to set up all my utilities for me. Something that was incredibly daunting to me when it was on a list of 100 things was easily doable for her.
My encouragement to you today is to think of the things in your life that feel overwhelming and consider if one of the primary reasons you feel so much anxiety is because you are buying into the belief that you are alone or have to do things on your own. You are not – I assure you of that. We live in an interdependent universe but in order to receive help and support, sometimes we have to ask for it (especially those of us who take pride in being self-sufficient).
UPdate the way you are handling a situation by reaching out. Delegate and appreciate the support that comes your way. Because we could all get by a little easier with a little help from our friends.
~ Christine Hassler, 20 Something Crisis Survival Expert, Campus Calm