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Campus Calm
had the opportunity to chat with Nancy Barry, our new Recent
College Graduate Expert, about her book, "When Reality Hits:
What Employers Want Recent College Graduates to Know." Nancy Barry, a
25-year corporate veteran, walked away from what she describes as "the
best job in the world" to share her extensive business experience
with others. She firmly believes "soft skills" are the key
to success in life and business. For more information about Nancy, check
out her website here.
 Campus Calm:
In your book you wrote that all recent college graduates have a degree in common
and that success after graduation is therefore largely measured by your "soft
skills." Can you briefly explain what your soft skills are?
Nancy: When you look at any job description
out there, the first line you're going to see is the degree they want
you to have earned. The second thing you're going to see are the years
of experience they want you to have, if any. Most of the rest that you
see are what I call the soft skills: Being an excellent communicator,
having the ability to work in a team, building and nurturing relationships,
having interpersonal skills, business etiquette savvy, meeting deadlines, and
all of those kinds of things.
Campus Calm:
How can the students start developing those soft skills if they don't possess
them?
Nancy: They just need to be keenly aware of what employers want from
recent college graduates. That's somebody who is going to come into the
work force with a strong work ethic, see everything as an opportunity,
be dedicated, enthusiastic, and passionate, and get the job done.
It also means realizing that when you go into the work place, just because
you've earned a college degree doesn't mean you know it all. Students really
need to be lifelong learners and know that they're going to be learning
for the rest of their lives.
Campus Calm: Adults love to tell students, "Just wait until you enter the real world." They make the real world sound like a horrible place (sans parties, spontaneity and fun). They sometimes make the real world sound like an illness that should be avoided at all costs. So what can you tell students about the real world ... the good, bad and the downright ugly?
 Nancy: Well, I would say that going from the college world to the real
world is a bit scary. If you think about it, when you're in college,
you pretty much are your own boss. You set your own schedule; you decide
what you're going to do and when you're going to do it.
When you enter the real world, you're going to have a boss, and it's
going to feel a little like you've moved back home. There's going to
be expectations, rules and guidelines. It's just going to be different
from anything you've experienced before, and that's not bad! Work is
not a four-letter word. Work is fun, especially if you find a job that
you're passionate about and you work for a company that you're proud
of.
Campus Calm:
Can you discuss why cultivating relationships with people is so important, regardless
of whether you decide to work for an employer or open your own business?
Nancy: I think that relationships are everything. The people I have
met along the way in my twenty-five years in the corporate world, and
now in the two plus years that I've had my own business, are everything.
Every success that I have ever had has been based on a relationship.
There are people out there who want to help you, and there are people
out there who need your help.
One of the keys to developing and nurturing strong relationships is to
always make it about the other person. When you meet someone new, immediately
turn the conversation to that person. Learn about their backgrounds and
needs. What can you do to help them? There is going to be a moment where
you need someone to open a door for you in life. If you think back to
all of the people that you've met and all of the relationships that you've
developed, I guarantee you that you're going to find someone who can
open that door for you.
Campus Calm:
College is one of the few times in our lives when we're encouraged to be self-focused.
Some recent grads carry that mentality into the working world. How can they
shift the focus off themselves and learn how to be team players?
Nancy: It's very important that they enter
the work world and realize that it's not about them - it's about the
team because no one can do a job alone.
If you can go into an organization and become what I call a "go-to" person,
who is someone who no matter what someone asks you to do, you have a
smile on your face and you say, "We'll make it happen." If they ask
you to make copies, you smile. You may be thinking, "I did not go to college
to make copies." If you become a go-to person, then every manager that
you work with will love you. I think that it's to a new grad's benefit not
to be self-focused.
Campus Calm:
Does thinking "we" instead of "I" mean that you have to ignore your own needs
and your own interests?
Nancy: Absolutely not. When I say to use the word "we" ten times more often
than you use the word "I," I'm not saying that you give up your own individual
dreams, desires, and focuses. When something is done in the work place, and
you say, "I did this," and "I did that," chances are you didn't do it by yourself.
You had some help. If you can give credit where credit is due and say, "we" ten
times more often than you say the word "I," you're going to have an amazing
career.
Campus Calm:
Can you offer some practical tips for recent grads on how to achieve a healthy
work/life balance?
Nancy: Yes, when you get into the workforce,
you need to work really hard and get as much done during the workday as you
can. Try not to get into the habit of bringing work home every single night.
Now, there are going to be times where you're going to need to work late, and
you should be willing to do that. If you get into the habit of doing that every
single night though, it's going to become a routine for you. You're going to
wake up a couple of years from now and wonder why you don't have a life.
Campus Calm:
Many new graduates feel pressured to get the perfect job right out of school
with the benefits package and great salary. What can you say about that?
Nancy: I think the main thing they need to realize is that they may or may
not find their dream job right when they get out of college, and that's ok.
You have a lot of time to find that dream job. Above salary, I would put the
passion for the work that you're going to be doing.
Now, the reality is that you have to earn enough money to pay the bills. You
want to have benefits to cover you if you have an emergency. If you graduate
from college and your primary focus is to try and find a job that offers the
largest salary and the best benefits package though, you may not be happy in
that position.
Campus Calm:
While salary is important what are the most important things to look for in
a first or second job? Isn't finding a supportive work culture and a boss who
is willing to be a mentor to you more important in the beginning?
Nancy: Well, in my opinion, it's very important.
Recent college graduates, when they go into an interview, forget that it's a
two-way conversation. The employers
are interviewing them to find out if they're the right fit for the position
and for the company. The recent college grads also need to see if that manager
is the right fit for them. The relationship that you have with your manager,
especially when you're starting your first career, is so important.
Campus Calm:
You wrote, "The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything.
They make the best of everything." That's a powerful statement. Can you explain
how students and recent grads can learn how to see everything in life as an
opportunity?
Nancy: If you go through life and you have that
positive attitude; you see everything as an opportunity, and you know that if
you're going to go to an event tonight that there's going to be an opportunity
to meet someone new. With every move you make something wonderful can happen
if you have that positive outlook.
Campus Calm:
What's the smartest way to handle mistakes in the working world?
Nancy: First, realize you're going to make
mistakes because you're human. Everybody makes mistakes - that's how we learn
and how we grow. The key to when you make a mistake is to own it. Don't play
the blame game. Don't immediately try to blame it on somebody else.
There are going to be times in your career when you're going to make a
mistake, and you're going to want to blame it on somebody else because
your boss is really upset. If you own it and say, "I take complete
responsibility," no matter what you've done, and no matter how mad
your boss is, there's really nothing else for your boss to say. It completely
disarms the other person.
Then as individuals, we can all say: "What did we do that led us to make
that mistake?" How can we learn from it, fix it, and then move on? Don't
spend hours, days and even months beating yourself up over a mistake.
Campus Calm:
I worked with a new graduate who couldn't handle constructive criticism. She
immediately became defensive when anyone tried to comment on her work and tell
her how it could be improved. Criticism stings. When I worked as an intern for
an online magazine, the editor ripped apart my articles and said, "When Maria
isn't overwriting, she has a clear voice that's engaging to the reader." I hated
her at first. But she was absolutely right. I was overwriting and when I chose
to hear and learn from her criticism it made me a better writer. How can new
graduates learn to embrace criticism with a positive attitude?
Nancy: First, you need to realize that you're not perfect. Step back and realize
what they said may be true and appreciate their feedback and not take it personally.
Don't be hurt by the tone by which they deliver it. There are so many managers
that are out in the workplace that have never been trained to be managers. They've
never been trained on how to deliver constructive criticism. Some do it really
well, and some are very blunt. Quickly get past the pain of what was just said,
and get to the root of what was just said. That is something that takes time.
It will take years to get comfortable with constructive criticism.
Campus Calm:
Let's talk about the dress code dilemma. What do employers want recent grads
to know?
Nancy: I think that the main thing they want is a professional image.
They don't want their employees to wear anything that's going to be a distraction.
That includes anything that's too revealing, too tight, too short, and
too wrinkled. Employers want to have a team of people that represent the
company well, so when they are interacting with clients, they're projecting
a professional image.
The twenty-somethings should also want the same thing because they want
people to take them seriously. They want people to focus on them, not their
clothes. They want them to focus on the intelligence they bring to the
position, the ideas they have and what they're saying, and not the clothes
they have on.
I would recommend that when somebody enters the workforce, look around and
see what the supervisors are wearing. The reason I say the supervisors is
because if you look at your peer group and they're dressed casually, you
might think, "Whoa, I didn't realize that we could dress that way." For all
you know, they're on probation for dressing that way. Don't dress like them.
Dress like a manager that you report to.
Campus Calm: Let's talk about office communication and e-mail etiquette in particular. Years of IMing friends haven't exactly made students grammar conscious. Your colleagues will not appreciate smiley faces, lols, btw, ttys, and other such abbreviations in your correspondence. What are some other points to remember before you hit the send button at work?
Nancy: Before you press that send button at work, you need to step back and put yourself on the receiving end of that e-mail. Ask yourself, "Is it professionally written?" You cannot send messages in the workplace that use the same style as an instant message or a text message. It has to be professionally written. It has to be spell checked, it has to be grammatically correct, written in complete sentences, and not start an e-mail salutation with something like, "Hey."
I had a dean at a university tell me, "Could you please tell the students
to not address me as, "Hey Kathleen." This is the dean at the university.
Before you hit the send button, check the grammar and the spelling. Don't
use abbreviations or smiley faces in the work force. Also check the tone
of the e-mail and make sure it's not too personal, because you are in the
workforce and it's a business setting.
Campus Calm: No all capitals either?
Nancy: Yes! If you use all lowercase, it seems too casual. If you use all uppercase and that goes through in an e-mail, it is as if you're screaming at the other person. If you send an e-mail like that to a client, then it won't be long before you get an e-mail from your boss asking you to come into her office.
Campus Calm: Procrastination is commonplace in college. How does this transfer over to the working world?
Nancy: Chances are that if you were a procrastinator in college, you're going to be a procrastinator in the working world. I think that the key to procrastination is to realize the amount of mental energy that we waste when we procrastinate. You will not have nearly as much fun in your career because you're going to be so stressed and that's going to add to that whole work/life balance issue.
Campus Calm: What advice do you have for new graduates about the temptations of office politics?
Nancy: Don't go there. Always take the high
road. Don't ever say anything bad about anyone, because if you slip just
one time, it will leave people wondering what you say behind their backs.
If you're in a situation where you're in a coffee area and there's a person
talking about something that's happened, I would not even join in the conversation.
I would take my cup of coffee, smile, and say, "I need to go back to
my office." I would not get involved.
Campus Calm: Is there anything else you'd like to add?
Nancy: My passion is to help twenty-somethings in their careers. Making that transition from the college world to the work world is a little scary, but it is so exciting. It is such a wonderful time in your life. If you can take the time to understand the importance of the soft skills in the work place, you are going to have an amazing career, because it's really all about the soft skills.
Check out Nancy Barry's monthly tips as our Recent College Graduate Expert
here.
© 2007 Maria L. Pascucci / Campus Calm.
About the author:
Maria Pascucci is the President of Campus Calm - the
award-winning website for today's stressed-out students, parents
and educators. Download your Stress-Less Kit with 4 FREE gifts at www.campuscalm.com.
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